baileythorne (![[info]](http://p-stat.livejournal.com/img/userinfo.gif){kind=small} baileythorne) wrote,@ 2007-11-06 15:35:00 |
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hibernating?
In response to my previous post:
"are you really somewhat hibernating or just not rushing to the next big thing?" (from roses_n_chains)
from the original quote:
"The symptoms of hibernating are easily detectable: first, restlessness. The second symptom (when hibernating becomes dangerous and might degenerate into death): absence of pleasure."
I have the first symptom. I don't have the second. Yet. But it's a matter of degrees.
There has been a huge shift in where/how I find pleasure. I used to find it in intimate interaction. Now I find it by walking on my back deck and seeing the violas are defying the cold weather. I find it in a single dance at practice after class with an older gentleman, "J", who I seem to dance well with. I find it in that damn dog I took care of last weekend - seeing his joy at getting to go for a ride in the car.
These are small pleasures. I miss the large pleasures.
Most days I trust I will find that again. Other days, I'm not so sure.
In response to my previous post:
"are you really somewhat hibernating or just not rushing to the next big thing?" (from roses_n_chains)
from the original quote:
"The symptoms of hibernating are easily detectable: first, restlessness. The second symptom (when hibernating becomes dangerous and might degenerate into death): absence of pleasure."
I have the first symptom. I don't have the second. Yet. But it's a matter of degrees.
There has been a huge shift in where/how I find pleasure. I used to find it in intimate interaction. Now I find it by walking on my back deck and seeing the violas are defying the cold weather. I find it in a single dance at practice after class with an older gentleman, "J", who I seem to dance well with. I find it in that damn dog I took care of last weekend - seeing his joy at getting to go for a ride in the car.
These are small pleasures. I miss the large pleasures.
Most days I trust I will find that again. Other days, I'm not so sure.
